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Sunday, November 16, 2008

Unsettled


I have felt really unsettled all weekend. I can't really pinpoint why, I just feel...off. I have spent a lot of quiet time by myself this weekend. Mostly by choice. I just wanted some time to read and to relax and to just not think about anything. But it's usually those kinds of weekends that I think about EVERYTHING. I was reading some of the news online today. It's just all so depressing. Everything is about violence and hate and disgusting things happening in the world. Or...about Obama. Which, for me, is just as unappealing to read about as the other stuff.
I watched a documentary about Jonestown today. Today is the 30th anniversary of the mass suicide. I couldn't believe how unbelievably disturbing that was. To watch so many good people get roped in to all of that. It just made me realize how vulnerable we humans are when we are down in life and have a lack of hope. Such a tragic story to watch.
My roommates dad fell off a latter and broke his back this weekend. :( I feel so bad for him, and my roommate also. She is worried sick about him understandably. They were going to have to rush him into surgery but now they are thinking on seeing if they can hold off. He is in a Denver hospital for a while. In what they call a 'clam shell' cast...basically is looks like a body cast wrapped around his torso. Poor guy :(
I am really glad the holidays are approaching. I miss my family a lot. I love living here in Colorado, but sometimes I wonder if it's worth being so far away from all of them and missing out on key things in their lives. And also to be able to help them out. A week and a half and I'm off to Indiana to spend some dad time, then just a few weeks after that off to Arizona for Mom and Stepdad and girls time. I wish I could see all my step siblings too, I feel like it's been so long since I've gotten to spend quality time with all of them. Ah the joys of being adults and being all spread out!

I don't really know what else to write today, just felt like I should write SOMETHING. I'm just feeling a little discouraged today. Wondering what plans God has next for me in life. There are days when it can be a very lonely world.

1 comment:

Tonya Lea said...

Hang in there...you'll figure it out.